lost

i have so much to write about but no patience or motivation to do so.
i had an awesome offroad ride with just john and myself on thursday evening. friday we met a bunch of people out at palos in the morning for a long ride. good times.
friday afternoon it was off to my aunts to celebrate our independence.
it was a fun filled action packed 2 days.
saturday we busted out of the house around 6:45 a.m. to make the long haul up to eau claire. i was super stoked for this race. it was my kind of course. it had mountain bikers singletrack. fast, flowy but pay attention.
i pre-rode with amelia and holly. if all went well i had hopes of top 5 but my goal was top 3. after pre-riding i knew this was a distinct possibility. it was my kind of course. i cleaned everything there with ease and actually looked forward to racing it. i hadn't looked forward to a race in so long.
come saturday morning i made sure i did everything right, time i ate, grabbed the right food, had extra in case i dropped anything, mixed my bottles, took my sport legs. i was ready.
at the start i was nervous. i know i can ride well in the singletrack with the best of them, but i still had a long lead out. for me anyway. i was in 3rd for a bit and then about 7 girls came on the left. i was blocked in the inside a bit but i wasn't worried. we still had a ways to go before the singletrack.
on that lone hill out there i stood up to make my move. BOOM. thrown off my bike.
i knew i blew a tire. sure enough. i had an air cartridge, made sure the tire was on and started to try and fill it. it wouldn't seal. race over.
bummer. big bummer. i thought i wanted to cry but i didn't. i was just bummed. i started walking my bike out. the tire kept coming off the rim. eventually i had to take the wheel off and walk it that way. it was a long walk of being bitten by those damn flies. you couldn't blow them off either, i had to stop and flick them.
so i was really irritated.
when i got back to the tent the sport women started to go through. i was so jealous. i couldn't believe that i wasn't out there with them. we drove all that way, stayed in a hotel and spent so much money to get there. i had thoughts of the elite race while walking. i didn't seriously think about it til someone else mentioned it.
thanks to barb and jerry i was able to register for the elite race. i had mixed feelings about it. but the need to race and ride the course won out over everything else. i didn't care about points or placing or anything at that point. i just wanted to ride.
i had mentally prepared that day for the sport race. putting myself into the elite race without being prepared mentally and physically not to mention my schedule of eating way off i knew wouldn't be in my favor. i wasn't expecting much.
thanks to all the girls for all their words of encouragement. i love wors.
it was as hard as i expected and actually the lead out was easier than i expected and that was only because i had girls to hang with. i thought i'd be all alone.
what i wasn't expecting was being knocked over, crashed in front of and trains as long as the singletrack.
i give most of the comp guys a lot of respect. there were times the back ups were extremely painful yet they waited it out. we were all bumping into each other, dabbing, etc because it was so slow going. i was suprised that a comp/elite race could go that slow. i don't think i'd ever gone that slow in a sport race.
i didn't do any better or worse than i expected yet i couldn't help but wonder had i actually prepared for the elite race instead of sport what i could've done. but it is what it is.
in the end it was just as painful as a sport race i just wished i wore chamois cream.
that was a long time to be sitting in those shorts.

*image by sheri